Sleep Regressions: When & Why They Happen & How to Survive
By: Liz Harden, MPH
What are Sleep Regressions?
Sleep “regressions” occur when a baby or child who was sleeping well (or at least okay), suddenly, seemingly inexplicably, starts sleeping poorly. The child may skip naps, fight sleep, resist bedtime, wake up a lot in the night and want to start the day before dawn. Needless to say, sleep regressions are exhausting for parents and caregivers and parents reach out all the time for help navigating these dicey periods in sleep. In this blog, I’m going to give you the down low on sleep regressions that commonly happen in the first few years, and how to survive them with relative ease.
Keep in mind that sleep regressions can happen due to teething, illness, travel, or changes to the routine or due to big leaps in cognition or physical abilities. When sleep patterns change due to brain development or working on new skills, this isn’t really a regression at all. They are progressing as little humans, learning and growing and becoming more capable, so the worsened sleep is actually due to a progression, not a regression.
Whether you’re dealing with the 4 month sleep progression, the 8-9-10 month, the 12 month, 18 month, or 2 year “regression,” they can be disruptive for sure. And since your child isn’t sleeping well, they may also be a hot mess during the day. They become overtired, which pumps cortisol through the system, makes their limited executive functioning more limited, and often leads to increased crying and crankiness day and night. Yikes!
When Do Sleep Regressions Typically Occur?
The first and most notorious sleep regression typically happens around 3 to 4 months–the infamous 4 Month Sleep Regression. This is when your baby’s sleep patterns change permanently, from newborn sleep to a more mature progression between sleep stages and cycles throughout the night, like older babies, children, and adults. There’s now a brief waking at the end of each sleep cycle, which happens every hour or so, all night long. During these brief arousals from sleep, we check to make sure that everything is “ok.” By “ok,” we mean: the same as when we fell asleep. If all’s well, we go right back to sleep and we typically don’t even remember waking in the morning.
If a baby falls asleep in your arms while rocking, nursing, or drinking a bottle, for example, and wakes up at the end of a sleep cycle in their own crib, they may not feel “ok.” Where are those snuggly arms that were holding them? This brief wake up and innate checking behavior is the cause of most “sleep problems” that babies experience once they’re out of the newborn stage. And it often comes to a head around 3 to 4 months of age when this big change in sleep patterns most typically happens. But again: this isn’t a regression at all! It’s a maturation in sleep architecture and progression in brain development that will last a lifetime.
The 8 (or 9 or 10) Month Sleep Regression
You can expect another rocky road in sleep at some point between 7-10 months, when your baby becomes more mobile, goes through a couple of huge cognitive leaps, and starts experiencing separation anxiety. This is often called the 8, 9, or 10-month sleep progression and it often coincides with learning to crawl and/or pull up.
The 12 Month Sleep Regression
Over the years, I’ve also found that another sleep regression tends to happen around the first birthday, and often plays out as nap resistance. This is the 12-month sleep regression (progression!). My hunch is that it happens when a kiddo is learning to walk and perhaps their nap needs are beginning to shift. But please don’t interpret this as your baby needing to drop a nap! Most babies need to hang on to two naps (but perhaps with longer wake windows) until at least 14 months or so.
The 18 Month Sleep Regression
Around 15-18 months, most babies make a leap toward toddlerhood. There’s newfound independence and excitement about being an actor in the big wide world, but this also comes with sizable separation anxiety. They also learn that they actually can assert their opinion and say “no” to something. The 18-month sleep regression often takes parents by surprise, because their baby has suddenly become a loud, persistent, and opinionated little being. For the first time, there’s an element of discipline that may be necessary around bedtime. This is a big shift!
The 2 Year Sleep Regression
Finally, the 2 year old sleep regression (which can happen at any point in toddlerhood or early preschool, but often around the second birthday or 2.5 years) can drop out of the clear blue sky and really throw parents into a tailspin. Suddenly, your kiddo who may have been sleeping really well, for as long as you can remember, starts screaming their head off at bedtime, and often in the middle of the night as well. Sometimes it also shows up as flat-out nap resistance (and they may or may not need the nap, but chances are they do if they’re younger than 3 years old). This particular regression is often due to big transitions (e.g., potty training, new schools or classrooms, new siblings, switching to a toddler bed) and shifting sleep needs. Fears may also emerge, and another wave of separation anxiety is common during this timeframe.
But honestly, these bouts of crummy sleep (aka sleep regressions due to progressions!) can happen any time your baby or child is mastering a new skill or experiencing a big cognitive boom. It’s also important to note that not all children experience sleep disturbances when they are going through these progressions. Every healthy baby will reach these various developmental and cognitive milestones, but the degree to which the progression impacts sleep will vary from one child to the next.
How Long Do Sleep Regressions Last?
Now we have a general understanding of when and why these sleep regressions last, but I bet you’re wondering how long? When sleep regressions are due to things like teething or illness, you can expect the regression to only last as long as the discomfort, so long as you go back to the old way of doing things quickly (e.g., maybe you rocked your baby to sleep when they were sick, but they usually fall asleep on their own).
When sleep regressions are due to cognitive or physical progressions, you can expect the period of disrupted sleep to last anywhere from about two to six weeks. You may be thinking: “YIKES! Six weeks? But that’s an eternity!” Fortunately, there are things you can do to speed up the process and ensure you’re supporting yourself and your child during this time of major growth!
How Do I Get Through Sleep Regressions As Smoothly As Possible?
Be mindful of schedule shifts. Scheduling issues can wreak havoc on your kiddo’s sleep. Ensure your child is following an age-appropriate schedule with enough awake time to build the sleep pressure they need to sleep well, while also preventing overtiredness. There’s a real balance and science to sleep schedules–so check out these blogs for 0 to 24 month and 2 to 5 year old scheduling guidance. Honing in on the “right” timing will help you avoid sleep problems caused by mistimed naps and bedtime. Sometimes, you can cruise with a sleep regression just by adjusting bedtime or shifting (or dropping) a nap.
Go back to the basics. Keep routines and sleep environment on point, even if they seem to be doing nothing to help your baby. Maintaining (or creating if you don’t yet have one) a consistent bedtime and naptime routine to help soothe your baby and teach them what to expect. Check out our 3 C’s of the bedtime routine to ensure your baby is getting what they need. Also, if your little one is resisting sleep, making sure that it’s extremely dark will block out distractions that may be keeping them awake. Create a “baby cave” to promote the best sleep possible during this crapola time.
Check your mindset. You cannot force sleep. Getting frustrated and trying to force sleep will do you no good. You’ll get more and more frustrated and your child will absorb that frantic energy. Studies show that little ones mimic their caregivers’ emotions—including stress and anxiety. Scientists call this neuroregulation. When we’re in a situation that causes stress to run high (like your baby fighting sleep or screaming at bedtime, naptime, or in the middle of the night) and we’re overwhelmed, angry, or frustrated, our kiddo can sense that and will respond similarly, making it even harder for them to settle into sleep.
Also, for babies who have been sleeping well and independently for a while now, and are in a regression due to a cognitive or physical leap, sometimes they just need some space to practice skills and process exciting new brain powers—yes, they may need this time awake in the middle of the night when there are no distractions. As much as is possible, leave them be! They may get a little frustrated here and there, but trying to force them to sleep, when they want to be awake, is an exercise in futility. In these scenarios, turning off the monitor and letting them practice in a safe space while you get the rest you need, is absolutely appropriate! Check out our Mindful Method for Sleep, to learn a simple, evidence-backed and mindfulness-based tool to help you through sleep regressions, and other frustrations in parenting and sleep, with less stress and more success.
Allow lots of time for practicing new skills during the day. If your baby is waking up in the night, getting stuck on their tummy, trying to pull up, rocking back and forth in an effort to crawl, or some other new feat of strength, make sure they get positive playtime in the crib/bed during the day. If they get sufficient practice and playtime during the day, they may require less at night (when you’re trying to sleep!). Check out this blog on positive playtime for inspiration. Also, If your baby or toddler is experiencing separation anxiety, you can use the positive playtime in the sleep space to help build their confidence.
Give extra comfort but avoid new sleep crutches. Try not to introduce new sleep crutches. For example, if your child was previously falling asleep on their own, try reassuring them with extra snuggles, but without putting them all the way to sleep. If you jump to full on rock-to-sleep or nurse-to-sleep mode, you can expect the regression to last a bit longer.
Find time for rest and embrace parental power naps! If you can grab a 15 minute snooze either at home while your child is nap, in your office or cubicle at work, or even with the front seat reclined in your car, you’ll be surprised what a huge difference closing your eyes and resting for a few minutes will do for your mental and physical health. There’s strong evidence for emotional and mental benefits of napping. If you are someone who has never been able to nap, try listening to a guided relaxation, breathing exercise, or yoga nidra (sleep yoga) on a free app like Insight Timer, or Headspace, Calm, or Expectful. Relaxing your body and mind for a short period of time can do wonders for your overall well-being when you sleep is disrupted and stress is running high!
Here’s a quick recap for your (probably tired) brain: your child’s brain goes through rapid development in the early years. Unfortunately, these bursts of mental and physical development tend to disrupt sleep for a while–typically 3 to 6 weeks. The impact of cognitive leaps and other brain development will vary from one kiddo to the next, but these stages are temporary–other than the permanent change to sleep patterns that happens around 3-4 months. And things will get back to normal with a little time and patience, and will likely get back to normal sooner if you take the 6 tips above to heart!
What If My Child’s Sleep Has NEVER Been Good? Or What If The Regression Has Continued Longer Than 6 Weeks?
Sometimes it’s helpful to bring in some outside support in sleep. Feel free to schedule a FREE intro call to discover how Little Dipper can support you in reaching all of your sleep goals. Or can access our free, sliding scale, and fee-based services here. Stellar sleep is on the horizon.
Liz Harden, MPH believes that every human deserves stellar sleep. As a certified sleep coach for more than nine years, Liz leads Little Dipper Sleep – a sleep coaching practice based in Chapel Hill, NC, serving clients worldwide. She and her team provide flexible, inclusive, evidence-based sleep coaching packages, programs, and classes to parents of kiddos, from newborns through elementary school and beyond. Known for creating the Mindful Method for Sleep(TM), Liz’s process equips parents with what nearly all sleep programs miss: the mindset tools and scientific insight they need to thrive and confidently set the stage for peaceful naptimes and bedtimes. Learn more on her website: www.littledipperwellness.com/
Last medically reviewed on August 8, 2022